Example Of Frame Control

I have written about frame control previously and how once you establish certain vibe, holding it is what makes or breaks seduction and relationships. Here is an example that happened last week:

I was out with my prime girl (PG) in rotation listening and dancing to live music my good friend was performing. Unfortunately, I didn’t consider that I met another girl (AG) at that time also in my rotation via same friend. As my luck turned out, she was there. I was dancing seductively with my prime girl pretty much whole night and there was much more going on under the table. As night was coming to a close, second girl came to my table.

AG: “Hi, what are you doing here?”
Me: “Same thing you are, listening to ”
(At that point it clicked that she could have been here whole time. When I saw her I kept my calm as nothing wrong was going on.)
Me: “How rude of me. This is…”
(They shook hands and exchanged polite “Hellos”)
AG: “It was nice seeing you. I will be going now, it is late.”
(It was around 2 AM)
Me: “Really? Late? You are really getting old.”
(She had birthday last weekend turning big 30)
AG: “You know me. Cya”
Me: “Cya”

Afterwards I took my PG to a balcony above the club and had my fun with her. Later we came back to my place for seconds. When I was going to bed around 6 AM I noticed a mail from AG. I read it next afternoon:

AG: “So, you brought a date to place where you could have, at least, asked yourself if I was going to be there. What can I conclude from this except that you don’t care?”

What would you do? How would you respond? Would you respond?

Ok, you have your answer. Here is mine.
Well, I thought of possible responses. If you don’t know what to say, usually it is best to  say nothing. But, in this situation, saying nothing would result in her dropping the ball. She wasn’t hooked enough for just silence to work. Another thing you can try is to evade the question by changing the subject. I also didn’t want to do that since my frame is more masculine than aloof one. I don’t run. Absolute worst thing would be to apologize, that’s what beta nice guy would do. I didn’t do anything wrong. I never promised her anything and explaining would result in drama she was trying to get me involved in. I also didn’t want to lie to her. I don’t like lying and try to avoid it, especially about stuff like this (little white lies don’t count). I’ve could have said something like “Do you really believe that I don’t have any other female friends in my life? So, you are going to be jealous about each and every of them? I don’t need this.” This is a textbook deflection and turning the tables (suddenly she is explaining herself). This would have worked since I have stronger frame, but this would involve lying and I wanted to find more clean (and alpha) solution.
I came up with this.

Me: “If I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t spend time with you.”

What is so good about this sentence? First it is shorter than hers. You don’t want to write longer responses than she does, at least not on regular basis. Secondly, I gave her something she lost – comfort. Also, it is absolutely true. There is no groveling or begging. Trying to explain or apologize. And it is about me.

This sentence reminded me about famous “You make me a better man” compliment. I suggest watching this clip. It is as alpha as it gets. You can find whole analysis here. She responded with:

AG: “Indirectly connected to this topic, do you know you leave a very slutty impression about yourself?”

Here, she is still any but can’t grab to anything from my response and is asking for more material. This is precisely why your messages should be short and clean. Additionally, she demonstrates the lack of basic understanding the difference between male and female notch count. She is judging me using “female logic”.

Me: “And cheeky, frivolous, elusive, impulsive, passionate, unpredictable, exciting, playful and other reasons you adore me. And don’t forget arrogant.”
(Notice a list aloof qualities that are sorted from more negative to more positive ones. And last one being a mixed one, that girls love. Again, I am not qualifying to her.)

AG: “And sometimes witty and funny. 🙂 Don’t forget selfish, another adorable quality. :P”
(Notice how far conversation has progressed from her being angry to now being amused. I didn’t respond. Next followup is even more interesting.)

AG: “We are really communicative last few days.
I am annoyed by this way of communication because it doesn’t solve things. And I like to have things concluded. Otherwise I complicate my life. 😉 (She cares, if she doesn’t she wouldn’t bother about things being solved or not. Also, I tease her a lot that she has a tendency to complicate everything.)
I was slightly angry at you because I expect a certain level or thoughtfulness and tenderness. And I am not that not jealous. 😛 But what can I do about that…
(She is almost apologizing. Her hamster is not allowing her to really apologize.)
Basically, you know I find you interesting (Really? I wouldn’t know?) (btw, not only for qualities such as playfulness or excitement but also because you are a deep person, you have strong will and other thing) and kind, but we are looking for different things. I need closeness and you want to experiment with always new experiences. Do you agree?” (These two qualities are not opposite or contradict each other.)

I could have written something like “A little jealously is not bad. And more closeness needs to be earned.” And she would have worked for it. She was looking for an excuse and my conformation to terminate this relationship (or at least not to progress further. She was not ready to do it herself. She was to hooked. But she is looking to settle down with slower life. I am not. She would need much more work and I she is worth it. Because of that, I decided to let her go. I responded with:

Me: “I agree.
Good luck and one parting gift (something every women should listen to):

Girls, if you want to keep a man around you need to boost your feminine essence. To do so I recommend the following:

  • Read The Rules Revisted and be prepared to learn from it rather than salve your ego by rejecting it. If you disagree with any post there it means you are wrong.
  • Change your diet away from man foods. Get more fresh vegetables, fruit, water, white meats.
  • Stop drinking alcohol. Really, try to entirely cut alcohol out of your life. If you must drink, avoid beers and lagers at all costs. More than anything else, alcohol and cigarettes ruin a girl’s hormone balance.
  • Don’t lift weights, circuit train or jog. Which girls have the most sexy feminine bodies? Yes, dancers, aerobics instructors and pilates girls. Joggers always look like shit.
  • Take pleasure in learning to cook and other girly hobbies. Make a real skill out of it. It’s so easy to set yourself apart from, and above, the crowd of girls with androgynous or masculine hobbies.”

I wanted to stay in good relationships with her. You never know when life will bring you together again. Never burn bridges behind you. If she is going to work on herself to become a better women, I might sample the change once. In her view, I exited as a very interesting and quality guy who is, unfortunately for her, looking for something different. She might come back. I only need to want her to come. And that is all I am looking for.

Advertisements

Men Are Getting Weak

Last week I was hanging with some of my female friends. Whatever some of the bloggers in the Sphere tell you, never burn your bridges. This is the number one rule of networking. Don’t burn bridges, just don’t invest too much time. One of those two was recently married and the other is in a LTR of six years. Both know about the Game (one of them actually introduced me to the concept). While girls were chatting about some girly stuff, I spent time with their guys. Somehow, we came to the topic of relationships. And those two guys started joking how their women are making all decisions. “My girl gives me the RC and asks me what I want to watch. I know this is just a token question since we end up watching something she wants.” Other guy said “Wen we go to the cinema, she always chooses the movie we are going to watch”. Then one of the girls interrupted “Honey, it is not true you don’t have a choice. You can pick the cinema we are going to.” All four started laughing. I felt disgusted. They continued on and it was clear my friends were those in control of their men. Since then I started noticing a growing trend where guys are behaving like whining pussies. I thought this was only happening in western countries where feminism is strong like States or UK, but not here in Croatia. I didn’t know our men are pussy wiped that much.

Who is wearing pants in this relationship?

Who is wearing pants in this relationship?

Then I wrote last night a story of my friend who has a similar problem. I feel sad for him when the solution for his problems is only to hold his frame and not take her shit. This is a big “only” I have been fighting him with. But I feel I am loosing the battle. Some guys just can’t be helped. It is sad when guys choose women over friends and family. I only hope one day he will realize the truth.
Today I was reading some blogs and I came to this article. I was shocked again. Igniss, a Croatian Game blogger, did a nice comparison and why more and more men are choosing to exit the sexual market. Because it is easier. A guy can get instant (but artificial) sexual satisfaction from masturbation or porn. No Game is needed. Success is guaranteed. Price is constant. No risk. Those guys spend their time “hanging out” and “socializing” with virtual friends who have similar believes. Usually it is playing video games all the time. It would be nice if this was some distant problem that didn’t affect me, but my younger brother is starting to show sings. And he was a bigger player than I was a couple of years ago. What happened?

I feel sad and disturbed for future men who decide to remain boys. There is only one solution.

Get out of comfort zone and start behaving like men!

Frame Control

Last night I have spent a night with a beautiful new girl (and a new flag). After finishing making love, I tend to ask new girls “What was the moment when you decided you are going to sleep with me? What is the moment I won you over”. She answered: “I can’t really choose a moment. It is more a sum of everything. But if I had to, it would be when we were walking through doors, you opened it for me and then pushed me with your hand on the bottom of my back.” She also added: “You like to be in charge and bossy. Your messages are short and precise”. (I utilize Roosh’s policy keeping texts only for settling logistics. e.g. “Meet me at the bar at 19:00. Dress nicely.”). She continued: “You are rough, but not always.” And then she winked at me seductively.

In my transformation from a nice guy to a masculine guy, I wanted to test how far I can go with stuff I learned all over the Sphere and Internet. That usually meant doing things nice guy in me felt were wrong. But, just for sake of experimenting I kept going and pushing (since obviously nice guy mentality didn’t work). From time to time I relapsed into the nice guy (usually especially when I slept with the girl, I wanted to help her somehow). As time passed by I kept relapsing less and less and with this last girl I can happily say I don’t consider her anything more than current entertainment. Some would call it a start of misogyny. Maybe they are right. But she is having as much fun as I am. “Return them better than you found them” is a self fulfilling prophecy since they enjoy me at least as much as I enjoy them (and they get to learn a thing or two). But I am getting of the subject.

The ting I did different with this girl is not to bother myself with what is she thinking or feeling. I kept doing things that a masculine, decisive guy would. And always escalate (verbally and physically). Treat her like a black box. Don’t listen what she is saying, observe her actions. I got challenged, but I stayed congruent with the image I was presenting. That is the frame control. If you falter for a second and fail incongruently some of her shit tests, you fail. Your lose any attraction you have built and it is game over. This should not discourage you to experiment.
It is hard for a reforming nice guy, and many relapse. They set masculine frame by threatening to leave when girl has much invested (LTR), but never do. And she knows it. And when there is a threat of leaving, she flashes wit her pussy a bit and he returns. Women knows her pussy is her greatest weapon. And she will use it if she knows it works. Because you have showed her!

Let’s get to the specifics. Always be a leader and in charge. Make all arrangements and decisions. It is OK to ask her opinion, but stick to only giving her options. Don’t make her make decisions.
Ask her to oblige to your standards. She is a part of your image when she is with you. Any resistance needs to be dealt with decisively. And she will resist (thus testing you). Punish her when she is not obliging by removing your attention from her, not commenting on something she worked hard and plainly ignoring her. Tease her. It is freakishly accurate how this resembles to training a dog.
Make her commit. Small commitments (coming to a meeting place you have chosen) at first and keep going from them (kino escalation, time investment, gifts, make out, hickeys, sex).
Always be the one to stop the interaction. Interaction can be texting, conversation, date, making out or sex. This shows you are in control.
Ask for what you want to do or think belongs to you. This also starts small (“I would fancy a walk before going to the bar”) and escalates (“I want another round with you”).
Handle LMR gracefully. Don’t show you are annoyed sexually depraved AFC you probably are. This is the basics of all techniques handling LMR. Even after sex, keep your frame. She didn’t give you anything, you weren’t lucky, you don’t have to grateful. You conquered her and you took it. And she loved it. When escalating towards sex, lead her, hold her and move her. Show your strength and masculinity. Learn about how to be a good kisser and lover. There is a ton of stuff on the Internet.

Improve yourself from inside out and everything else will fall into place.