How to touch a women, or more commonly known kino is one of the milestones in any gamer’s career. Mostly what I have been talking about in this blog was how to convey value by verbal or nonverbal communication. This can get you pretty far in a relationship with a woman, but where you will get might not be where you wanted to be. Whether or not you use touch (kino) as part of seduction process, will depend if a girl will perceive you as a sexual partner or mere friend. Touching sends a clear message – I want you more than just a friendship.
This was a difficult subject for me for a long time. I knew how to get girl interested. I knew how to get her comfortable and connect with her. But I didn’t know how to proceed. Touching people who were not close to me (like family) was awkward. It didn’t feel right or being myself. So, there was a paradigm. I could get girl pretty quickly to my apartment but then when I needed to proceed there was that insecurity. That was extremely incongruent moment where girl started thinking “Was this guy faking all this time?”. Of course, this was the worst case scenario. Luckily, girls here are not as hypergamous as those in the States so some mistakes are allowed. I, as nerd, needed instructions, needed a game plan. I needed something concrete I could use, what routines were when I was beginning with the Game.
I did quite extensive research on my subject. First, I looked at what information sources I had available at time. So I looked at routines featured in the Game by Neil Strauss. Afterwards, I looked at Mystery’s kino escalation guide. I found out about philosophy behind kino escalation: touch should never be a big thing. If you get her accustomed to you touching her (and she touching you), there won’t be any big moments such as first kiss. Therefore, I learned some basic palm reading, how to open with touch (tap on the shoulder, graze her when walking by), how to use “incidental” touch (taping shoulder when explaining, hugs as rewards for compliance…), friendship (compliance) test routine,… But this was all “innocent” touching used to spark attraction. I still didn’t have a full plan what to do when I get a girl back home. Then I learned about DiCarlo’s Escalation Ladder. I started field testing the method and I’ve hit jackpot. I am still using this framework today, although I have internalized it so I don’t need to follow it step by step. I occasionally use it when I get stuck or have a brain freeze. Besides this framework I suggest researching in more details on topics mentioned in the ladder depending on your knowledge and experience (e.g. french kissing, fingering, sex techniques).
One last point, learn to multitask. Each of your hands and your head (mouth) should be able to operate separately. That way, when you distract her with kissing, you can start fingering her and undressing her with hands. In time she will find herself in “it just happened” situation.
Each new notch will teach you something new, something she likes. Talk with your guy friends and exchange notes.
Have fun and experiment.